The Truth About Rewards in ABA — Are We Bribing Kids?
By Stephanie O’Driscoll, MA, BCBA, LBA
If you’ve ever watched an ABA session and seen a child earn a sticker, extra playtime, or access to a favorite toy, you might have wondered:
“Wait… is this just bribing kids to behave?”
It’s a fair question. And the short answer is:
No — reinforcement in ABA is not bribery.
But the difference isn’t always obvious from the outside.
Let’s break it down.
Bribery vs. Reinforcement: What’s the Difference?
Bribery usually happens during or after a problem has already started.
It sounds like:
“If you stop screaming, I’ll give you candy.”
In that moment, the child learns:
Big behavior → Reward
That can accidentally make challenging behavior more likely in the future.
Reinforcement, on the other hand, is planned and happens after a positive or desired behavior.
It sounds like:
“You asked for a break calmly — great job. Let’s take that break.”
Now the child learns:
Using a skill → Good things happen
That’s how new behaviors grow.
Why Rewards Are Used in the First Place
All humans are motivated by outcomes. Adults go to work for pay. We check our phones for messages. We exercise to feel better or stay healthy.
Kids are no different — especially when they’re being asked to practice skills that are hard for them.
For children with behavioral or developmental challenges, things like:
Asking for help
Waiting
Following directions
Tolerating frustration
may take real effort. Reinforcement helps make that effort worthwhile while the skill is still new.
Rewards Are Not the End Goal
A common concern is, “Will my child only behave if they get a reward?”
Good ABA doesn’t stop at stickers or tokens. Reinforcement is used intentionally and then gradually faded as:
The skill becomes easier
The child experiences natural benefits (success at school, smoother playdates, less frustration)
Social reinforcement (praise, pride, independence) becomes more meaningful
The goal is not lifelong prizes. The goal is building skills that eventually stand on their own.
We Already Use Reinforcement — We Just Don’t Call It That
Think about how often you naturally reinforce behavior:
Smiling when your child shares
Thanking them for helping
Letting them pick the movie after a long week
Saying “I’m proud of you” after they try something hard
That’s reinforcement. ABA just makes the process more structured and intentional when a child needs extra support learning certain skills.
What Matters Most: What Are We Reinforcing?
Ethical ABA focuses on reinforcing:
Communication
Coping skills
Independence
Social interaction
Flexibility
It’s not about forcing compliance or creating “perfect” behavior. It’s about helping children learn safer, more effective ways to get their needs met and participate in daily life.
A Final Thought
Reinforcement isn’t bribery — it’s how learning works.
When used thoughtfully, rewards are simply tools that help children practice hard skills long enough for those skills to become habits.
And over time, the biggest reward isn’t a sticker or a snack.
It’s a child who can say what they need, handle challenges more calmly, and move through their world with more confidence and success.